Sep. 20th, 2010

grrgoyl: (Dr. Horrible)
I have quite an exciting update brewing, with movie reviews and adventures with dogs and not a word about bicycling at all. But as good as that's going to be, this one is even better.

One of my Christmas presents from Tery last year was a gift certificate to SkyVenture, indoor skydiving; or, as [livejournal.com profile] meamjeffyjeff put it, "standing over a jet engine and letting it lift you up."



Tery thought my choice of music was "a little gay," but c'mon...if I ran the place, I'd play nothing else until my employees threatened to quit. Note: For some reason Facebook seems to end the video prematurely unless you watch it on THEIR page (but YouTube was being even less cooperative, compressing the quality down to unwatchable no matter what I tried). If you want to see the whole glorious 6-1/2 minutes (up to me bitching about my sore back while de-gearing), I encourage you to go watch it there.

Tery got me the primo package, which included the class, the gear and two 2-minute flights -- which sounded like a bit of a racket, but it turns out two minutes is almost too long (as a beginner), it felt like ten. The basic includes only two 1-minute flights, and I think that would be way too short.

You take a little class where you learn the hand signals (which all fly straight out of your head the minute you first step into the chamber). The instructor really is only in there to help you achieve the perfect form for the best flight; well, that and to keep you from crashing headfirst into the wall. Then you suit up and wait in the antechamber for your turn.

I thought the little wingie things on the back of the suits were to maximize aerodynamics, but it turns out they just give the instructor something to grab onto so he can haul you around like a sack of potatoes.

When I said two minutes was too long, it's because your sinuses get so dried out with the air blowing up them it hurts to breathe. It was also ridiculously difficult to close my mouth, which was still preferable to the uncontrollable drooling that the instructor promised us (I didn't have any). Plus that position isn't the most comfortable to maintain for two minutes straight, especially if you're all tensed up in terror.

Not that I was. There were about eight of us in the group, and, at the risk of blowing my own horn, I think I was the star pupil. Tery and Deb agreed; they said he stepped back and left me on my own much quicker than anyone else. I could tell he really wanted me to go higher and higher (the chamber goes up about twenty feet inside; and no, there's no spinning Willy Wonka fan at the top), and near the end when he's making those twirly signs to me, he was giving me a little advanced tip on how to spin deliberately (you cup both hands facing sideways).

At the other end of the spectrum was the big guy who went last, who just couldn't relax enough to get it. Despite the instructor telling him repeatedly to spread his legs more (and even finally grabbing his ankles and trying to forcibly pry them apart), he wouldn't break his rigid posture and ended up getting buffeted about helplessly (probably also working against him was the high force of wind needed to keep him aloft, which was controlled by a guy in a booth. That must be why they put a weight limit of 250 pounds on flyers).

It was an incredible experience, even though my back hurt at the end from arching so long in addition to the nasal issue (and today my glutes are killing me). Return flyers get a discounted rate -- $15 a minute as opposed to the startup package, which was so obscenely expensive I won't tell you (unless asked). I'll bet it's even more fun when you don't spend the whole time trying to remember everything you need to do with your body to stay in control. And I can't imagine how much practice you need to do some of the fancy stunts you saw in the video (our instructor confessed he was in Special Forces originally, so he's been playing in mid air for quite awhile. Did you see how he could free fall straight down and stop himself an inch from the floor??!?)

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